Friday, June 01, 2012 @ 11:53 AM
It kills me too.

Thursday, May 31, 2012 @ 11:00 PM
I have finally lost all love and acceptance for myself. I'm utterly disgusted with the being I am. All this while, I have been living a lie. I have been lying to myself , perceiving that I'm as such and such . Matter of fact, ive been putting a front to the world making myself as presentable as I can to your eyes . And when I receive positive responses I deceive mysel into thinking that I'm that good after all. At the end of the day, I lack a heart to care . I lack a mind to be aware of logics. I should devoid myself of love and thoughts .

Monday, May 28, 2012 @ 10:48 PM
Yesterday's game was one of those rare times where it didn't feel too painful to lose. We fought hard and played well collectively. It was really nice to see the hunger in everyobe's game. At the end of the day, we knew that we should be proud of our performance simply because for once we instilled fear in them. Giving them such a tough fight to the point they got really frustrated. That itself is a compliment ! Hopefully we can continue putting up such solid team performances like this for the next games.

@ 10:30 AM
You mend what you break. If you don't bother to do it, your life will be in pieces as well. And if it is worth it, you will do all you can to fit those pieces back again no matter how hard it can be. Right?

Sunday, May 27, 2012 @ 12:19 PM
That mixture of frustration and sadness is slowly eating me up

@ 12:16 PM
I am a disappointment to self and a greater disappointment to others.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012 @ 1:55 PM
Each time i think my table is kindaaa messy, i just have to look around and i feel so much better after that ;)

Tuesday, May 22, 2012 @ 8:53 AM
Today marks my second year of teaching. My oh my, 2 years already? I still feel new and "young" to the service though technically ive graduated from the "beginning teacher" ranking. haha Doesnt feel like 2 years. Each day is still a learning day for me to be more informed and erm..find ways not to screw myself or the kids up. But i do feel that ive "grown" a lot in these 2 years. Ive picked up many skills, tips here and there. Ive learnt plenty of rules and procedures in the system. Ive learnt how to play around in the system such that i dont get myself much into trouble =P I must admit it can be scary because there is just so much to know and remember. MOE never fails to add new things and new acroynms to remember. And most of the time, it does not have anything to do with teaching! Workload wise, it gets heavier each year. It is a sign of progression i think. With more money comes more responsibilities. haha People often asked me when am i leaving the school. As of my 2nd year, i am already eligible to ask for a transfer. To be honest, as much as i hear nice stories from the other schools, i dont often look too far off. Im one who is easily contented and as much as some days i complain here and there about the school, I am contented to be here. I dont have much trouble. Yes the only prick in the ass is the cca i am in but other than that, things are smooth sailing here. I cant ask for perfection so what i have here is good enough. The people around here are nice to me. I have a bunch of colleagues whom im closer with, and they make a good support group when i am in school. Sad to see them leaving the school one by one though. THey have been in the school much longer than me and i guess eventually, one either seek new challenges else where or just get tired of the system here. Who knows, i might be in the spot like them a few years down the road. Who knows. But whatever it is, i do believe there are some things that are meant to be and i am glad that i am meant to be placed here.

Monday, May 21, 2012 @ 10:28 PM
And so it is finally the last week of semester 1. The June holidays are lurking and i cant wait to be out of school.Not that i dislike my job or what, it is just that it is a nice feeling to drop work and responsibilities and just take a breather. Away from the chaos of school to include more peace and quiet in my days. haha I really need that.

@ 9:19 PM
The shall be my second motto in life.

@ 9:01 PM
Sometimes ive this feeling that my cats really understand what im saying. Kinda comforting somehow.